family

My parents come in a little less than an hour. I told them my morning class would last till 1 or 2, because I thought it would--at first, anyway, and then later I was just lying--and so they were waiting for my call in parts undisclosed but an hourish away.

I have no idea why I am dreading their visit so very much.

I've cleared out most of the objectionables, though my place still isn't clean and I give up. I'm writing this entry kind of to figure out a dilemma. See, I've hidden my Jim Beam, but I have three smirnoffs in my fridge. What's wrong with alcohol in the house, you're over 21, some of you might wonder. Even given the fact that my dad's a recovering alcoholic, it really shouldn't be a problem that I have three little smirnoffs. Alcoholism isn't like kleptomania. But, I dunno. I feel like I'm expected to be all Carrie Nation or something. Whenever my mom sees or hears of me drinking, she gets weird. My dad also has depression, which he did pass down to me if that's how it even works, and passed on to my brother too. And then a few years ago my brother decided he was an alcoholic, then a few months later was all "just kidding" which didn't help things probably. They're just funny about it, is all, my family.

So, the idea I had, was to drink two of them before they got here. One little smirnoff looks much less alcoholic than three, is what I thought. Though this might be counterintuitive, because it would then mean I'd had 5, rather than 3, but....but all that alcohol.

And there's no way I can put away 3 before they're here. Besides, I'm a grown woman, what is wrong with alcohol?

What I see happening, which isn't even a big deal I guess, is that my mom will notice the bottles or bottle (depending how I resolve this dilemma), say something with the gist being, "oh, there is some alcohol. (my daughter is a drunk)." and I will be all, "YES, THERE IS ALCOHOL. I LIKE ME A BOTTLE EVERY BREAKFAST." and then she'll be upset at my tone, and I'll reciprocate by going "SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP," because I will in fact then be drunk, from the two bottles, and "MAYBE I AM AN ALCOHOLIC," I'll say...
I'll leave the bottles, then. Ok.